Sunday, 17 February 2013

...a dreary, miserable rainy day...

what a miserable day

Blogs, facebook, instagram etc, all this social media we have, tends to show our best sides, our happy times and our triumphs and successes. Well thats not a true representation of who we are, so in honour of full disclosure and honesty, here I bring to you my crappy, crappy day.
It may not be punctuated correctly, may not be spelt correctly, and may not be politically correct, but today I don't care, because today is a miserable day.

Normally rain elicits in me, cozy feelings of peace and contentment, 
the desire to read a book curled up in bed,
 watch some movies, curled up in bed, 
basically doing anything curled up in bed.

Today though is not the case. Today this dreary soul sucking rain is producing the opposite. 
Grumpy pants has reared her ugly head and it is resulting in a miserable day. 
You want to know how I am going do you facebook? Well today sucks.
Eat clean you tell me facebook? 
Get stuffed clean eating, I want chocolate and more chocolate.
Feed me mummy I am hungry mummy, screams Holly, well Holly you only went down ten minutes ago and only fed an hour ago so mummy doesn't want to feed you right now!
Molly runs out in the rain and gets muddy, so now its bath the dog Jem or your house will turn into a muddy swamp of paw prints.
 Well I don't want to bath the dog, so a towel dry will suffice ok! 
A ten minute phone conversation with my husband has been the only words to come out of my mouth all day.

How do I get out of this dreary state of mind, go out somewhere you say? Do something, go to the shops, see a friend? 
Well this stinking rain is making that pretty impossible!

There we are, rant over, tomorrow is another day. 
Sometimes we have miserable days, for no other reason then just because. 
But the sun will set, and rise again, to a new day, with hopefully a much 
more positive out look and hopefully I will not wake up with my grumpy pants on. 
No, in fact I choose tomorrow morning, not to put my grumpy pants on! 

Wednesday, 13 February 2013

...Family/Maternity Photos...

...Family/Maternity Photos...

I really wanted some professional maternity photos this time around as I didn't have any from my first pregnancy, and we also haven't had any family portraits done. 
We couldn't afford this, but I also couldn't get behind my own camera to take the photos of myself ;) 
So my wonderful sister in law (who is also the author of the lovely blog Saffron Threads) agreed to help me out. I set up my camera, and pre planned all the pictures I wanted and Katherine did a wonderful job of understanding my very incoherent directions. I found being in front of the camera is not 
quite as fun as it used to be, and trying to be behind the camera and in front of it at the same time is crazy ridiculous. But nevertheless, thanks to Kt we got some nice shots. Here are a few of my favs :)

Tuesday, 12 February 2013

Holly's Room

Holly's Nursery

When I first found out I was pregnant, aside from the obvious things to be excited about, I was also so excited to be able to design and create a new room in the house. 
We are renters and therefore I wasn't able to paint walls etc, which I would of loved to do. 
So as we all do, I went to Pinterest for inspiration and found my colour scheme.

Candied Pastels 

I had to start by painting Rayya's old mahogany wood cot, white. Which let me tell you, with a small hand sander was a ridiculous idea! Nevertheless It was eventually finished. 

Then one weekend my husband and I were browsing through Target and by chance I came across the first item I decided to base the nursery around. This picture:

The colour was perfect, and I loved the words, they were perfect to me, as prayers for her life to always be above her cot.
I knew I wanted to make her cot quilt, and I knew I wanted to use  the same material and frame it as two pictures on either side of this one. And so I went to the ever lovely Etsy and ordered material. This is how my picture frames ended up;

The next stage was making the quilt, and having not made a patchwork quilt since high school,I was quite nervous of how it would turn out. There are many mistakes, but only if you look really close.I haven't yet finished the binding as miss Holly decided to make a dramatic entrance into the world 6 weeks early but here is the quilt as it is so far;

We purchased a cute drawer set and added a couple of nik naks on top, as well as beautiful nursing chair.

And the knitted blanket on the chair was also from Etsy. 
Here is the finished product:

Sunday, 10 February 2013

A Shower of Babies

 *A Shower of Babies*

To celebrate the impending birth of my second daughter Holly,
I decided to throw a High Tea Baby Shower.

I ran with the colour theme I used for her nursery of "Candied Pastels" and of course what would an event be these days without pompoms? :P

 I made these ones myself, which was rather time consuming but saved me over $30 plus postage. 

I may have my priorities a little messed up as food wasn't such a big deal to me so long as everything 'looked pretty'.
But with the help of some friends and family we had way more then we needed.

And after a few baby games and predictions, guests went home with one of these party favours. Baby food jars washed out and filled with marshmallows and covered with scrap material I had. 

Thanks to everyone who came, and for all your lovely gifts. We had some crazy predictions, but after all she was born 6 weeks prem and a tiny 1.9kg! Who could of guessed :)

Monday, 30 July 2012

...our magic bean...

...Our Little Magic Bean...

...We have been on a bit of a journey these last 12 months. After having extensive Bowel Surgery about 9 months ago, and considering my Crohns Disease, having another baby was looking to be quite an impossibility. After finally getting the Ok from my doctors to start trying we were overwhelmed with the warnings and risks, and likelihood that I may not be able to fall pregnant. After trying for a while, and after numerous negative test results, another visit to my specialist ended in tears as they once again reiterated that it could be quite difficult for me to fall pregnant, and to top it all off, needed once again to head back for more surgery...

...Terry collected a tearful wife as we discussed the situation. It has often been said to us by people meaning well, that if we can't have a baby, at least we have Rayya. Which is true, she is such a joy and immense blessing, but we really wanted to be able to give her a little brother or sister. So with Terry's words of faith and comfort, knowing that we were in God's hands, and if its not the time for us right now, then we will be ok, and that our priority is first to my health, I prepared my heart to move on from this desire for the time being. 

...And so the next day with one pregnancy test left in the drawer, I decided to take the test one last time, and move on. Expecting a negative result, like all the times before, I was in absolute shock to see TWO pink lines in the results window! A positive test! I could not believe it! I drove straight to Terry's work with an 'early birthday present' for him, the positive test result wrapped in a tiny onesie...

...We were in a state of disbelief, we couldn't believe it especially after the day before, and coming to terms with not having a baby right now. All we could think was how amazing is God!...

...It wasn't smooth sailing from then on, our first scan revealed no heart beat, and no further signs of a baby other then a sac. This was a difficult day, and an even more difficult two weeks waiting to have another scan. In this time I also ended up back in hospital extremely ill as I had stopped my medication when I found out I was pregnant...

...After strict instructions to stay on my medication through my pregnancy, my health improved and the next scan showed a little bubba and a tiny heart beat. It was such a relief. It is such an emotional rollercoaster, I still hadn't let myself become attached to the idea that I was pregnant, wanting to be prepared for the worst. We only told immediate family and waited for our 12 week scan to see if everything was still going along well. And at 13 weeks we had our scan and saw our perfect little baby, strong heart beat, actively moving and growing and developing so fast. All tests came back well, and we were finally able to share the exciting news. Its still going to be a journey from here on out, I am in Tertiary care at the Royal, under the head of Obstetrics as well as my gastro specialist. I  have to remain on my regime of quite intense medications, in order for the baby to obtain nutrients from me. So there are still risks, there are also strong chances of premature birth and a small baby, but God has got us this far with our Little Magic Bean, and we are trusting it all to Him. We will be having frequent scans to check babies growth, and I have so many appointments all the way at the Royal so regularly. For the past three weeks I have had at least two appointments each week...

...We are 15+ weeks pregnant, and due on the 22nd January...

Wednesday, 30 May 2012

...there is always hope...

We can rejoice, too, when we run into problems and trials, for we know that they help us develop endurance. And endurance develops strength of character, and character strengthens our confident hope of salvation. And this hope will not lead to disappointment. For we know how dearly God loves us, because he has given us the Holy Spirit to fill our hearts with his love.

Romans 5:3-5 NLT

One of the aims I had coming into this year, as I have spoken about in this blog, was that this year my illness (Crohns Disease) was not going to define me. Last year my illness dictated to me what I would and would not do that year, it kept me from success in work, it kept me from social outings and therefore friendships. It effected my role as a mother and wife.

And after surgery, and new treatments, this year I was determined to rise above it and not let myself be consumed by my difficulties.
But amidst another wave of bad health and complications, life becomes too much and I find myself once again being defined by this disease. It dictates to me again what I can and cannot do, causes me to hide back under the covers and black out the world. I hate this disease, I hate that I have it. 

I want to be able to choose life, to smile amidst the pain and live in-spite of the disease. But sometimes its so exhausting and too hard. And I sat in the hospital this week looking around me at all the people who are suffering with illnesses far worse then mine, and I wonder how on earth they make it through, as I feel that I cannot even cope with the load I am carrying as it is. 

The verse from Romans at the top of the page has been running through my mind all week, and I am trying to cling to that. Although I feel at this moment, that I am not growing in character, sitting feeling sorry for myself, maybe one day I will look back and see the change that God has begun in me. I was also inspired by a recent ad on television, I was captivated by this ad from the moment Toni Collette opened her mouth, and although I was disappointed to see it was an ad for a bank, I still appreciate the words of this poem.

However in my personal belief system, it is not me who can remove that one insignificant letter, it is God. And it is God who can and will restore me to a place of health, in his plan and time. He has blessed me with wonderful family, and when health is a major issue in life, one of the blessings is that you more frequently are drawn to reevaluate your priorities and become aware of the blessings you do have. In my case, a wonderful family, both immediate and extended. A house over our head, food on the table, love and support, and hope for a better future. 

There’s a four lettered word
As offensive as any
It holds back the few
Puts a stop to the many.
You can’t climb that mountain
You can’t cross the sea
You can’t become anything you want to be.
He can’t hit a century
They can’t find a cure.
She can’t think about leaving or searching for more.
Because Can’t is a word with a habit of stopping
The ebb and the flow of ideas
It keeps dropping
itself where we know in our hearts it’s not needed
And saying “don’t go” when we could have succeeded.
But those four little letters
That end with a T
They can change in an instant
When shortened to three.
We can take off the T
We can do it today
We can move forward not back
We can find our own way.
We can build we can run
We can follow the sun
We can push we can pull
We can say I’m someone
Who refuses to believe
That life can’t be better
With the removal of one
Insignificant letter.

Tuesday, 29 May 2012 nose and tiny toes...

...Levi Bain Adcock...
...10 days old...

...Photographs I took of my beautiful nephew at 10 days old...
...He is just precious...
...Praying that his little life will be blessed always...
...And his sweet heart will seek his Lord...